Dude Looks Like A Lady
by ChibiShiva
Summary: *YAOI* A man is waiting for the love of his life, and Kuja happens to be there at the same time.... Keep that in your mind: English is my second language, it may be full of grammar errors. I don't own Kuja or any FF characters.Please R


__

_The following is what you get when mixing an Aerosmith song and a crazy author known as Shiva102: a stupid fanfic. It's not a songfic, and it's not Kuja-bashing either (love him too much.......). Just I thought he looked like a girl! I'm not responsible for any mental problems caused by this fic, reminds that it has a LOT af YAOI (m/m stuff).___

_ I DON'T OWN KUJA (D-OH!) but I own "man" and I don't make money with them anyway. ___

**_Dude Looks Like A Lady_**   
_Kuja: *gets out of the Alexandria Castle*_   
_Kuja: AHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! She's finally under my control! And those clowns... Zorn and Thorn._   
_ I'm the best!!!!!!! MUAHHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!_   
_Man: *stares at Kuja*_   
_Kuja: What are you lookin' at?!_   
_Man: You're a hell of a cutie, girl._   
_Kuja: S'cuse me, but I'm not your cutie._   
_Man: Sorry, girl. (She's damn hot.... but sooo serious)_   
_Kuja: Look, I'm not a girl... I'm a-_   
_Man: Very sorry, young lady. Wanna come to my house for supper?_   
_Kuja: Food eh? OK, but for the last time I'M NOT A YOUNG LADY!!!_   
_Man: *on a sarcastis tone* Yeah yeah... I believe you._   
_Kuja: *groans*_   
_Man: So how old are you?_   
_Kuja: *annoyed* 24. You?_   
_Man: Me, I'm 35. You're so cute girl. I'll never stop staring at you._   
_Kuja: *screaming* I'M NOT A GIRL YOU-_   
_Man: Stop screaming like that, cute girl._   
_Kuja: *whining* Ohhhh come on..._

_Time stops, except for Kuja._

_Voice from the sky: *laughing* What's wrong... cutie?_   
_Kuja: Who are you?_   
_Voice from the sky: I'm the author of the fan fic, Shiva102._   
_Kuja: *whining* Make that nonsense stop pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease....._   
_Shiva102: Wait until the end. Alrighty?_   
_Kuja: Oh man......._   
_Shiva102: Oups! I gotta go.... see ya later.... cutie!_   
_Kuja: *sreaming* STOP IT!!!!!!!!!!! I'M NOT A CUTIE!!!!!_

_Time continues to flow._

_Man: We're at my house. Sit down right here, I'll be back with delicious food for the cutest woman in_   
_ the world._   
_Kuja: *really annoyed* Look, I'm not a-_   
_Man: So, are you from here?_   
_Kuja: Nah. I'm from Terra._   
_Man: Terra? Never heard of it. But the girls are sure cute there if they're like you._   
_Kuja: SHIVA102!!!!!!!! COME HERE!!!!_   
_Shiva102: *blowing raspberries*_

_Later that same evening...._

_Man: Could you come here, you cute thing?_   
_Kuja: I'm not your cute thing, I'm nobody's cute thing._   
_Man: Come on, stop doing this._   
_Man: *points the bed*_   
_Kuja: *turns white*_   
_Kuja: I don't think this is a good idea..._   
_Man: Why? Come on, get naked, baby._   
_Shiva102: *sings "Get Naked" from Methods of Mayhem*_   
_Kuja: SHUUUUUUUUUT UUUUUUUUPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_   
_Shiva102: *stops singing*_   
_Man: *gets close to Kuja*_   
_Kuja: *backs off*_   
_Man: *runs after his so-called cutie*_   
_Kuja: *searching his breath* Stop........ it......... ohhhhhh ALL RIGHT, do what you want... I'm yours._   
_Man: *sigh* That's better._   
_Man: *starting to undress Kuja*_   
_Kuja: SHIVA102!!!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!_   
_Man: *looks at Kuja, naked*_   
_Man: YOU'RE A GUY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Why didn't you tell it before?!_   
_Kuja: *incredibly annoyed, alomst in is Trance mode* What the hell do you think I tried to say every_   
_ time you were calling me "cutie", "girl" or something like that!_   
_Man: I'm soooo sorry. BYE BYE..........._   
_Man: *gets out of the house as fats as he can*_   
_Kuja: *Casts Ultima two times, summons Bahamut, Odin, Atomos, Leviathan, casts Firaga, Thundaga,_   
_ Blizzaga, Meteor, kills the man.*_   
_Kuja: *Faces Shiva102, smirks*_   
_Shiva102: THE END!!!!!_   
_Kuja: *relieved* That's better... *sarcastic* Now for you, I reserved the best. MWAHHAA MWAHAHA_   
_Kuja: *Repeats the same magics, but doesn't kill Shiva102*_   
_Shiva102: *blows rapsberries*_   


_The **real** end._   
  
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   [1]: ../../MAIN.htm



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